Elephant, conditioning

What do baby elephants, fleas and humans have in common and why it this important for your success?

October 08, 20245 min read

You may have heard about how baby elephants in circuses are kept from escaping and trained to be docile by chaining one of their legs to a post. At that age, they are not strong enough to break the chains. As these babies grow into heavy, strong adult elephants, they could easily break free from the chains.  However, their early experience with the chains still prevail; they are conditioned into believing that they are not powerful enough to win against their shackles. The thin chains from their childhood don’t need to be replaced by thicker ones because they just stopped trying. (Feel free to watch this video if you have never heard about this syndrome.)

There are also experiments with fleas that prove that they are programmed by their environment: The fleas, whose nature is to jump high, are placed in a jar with a lid. They are left in the closed jar for three days, and because they bump against the lid with each jump, they reduce the height of their jumping. When the lid is removed, the fleas stay in the jar. They are programmed for the rest of their lives. (Watch video.)

We humans are equally conditioned. Or as brilliant Vera F. Birkenbihl, a German researcher and trainer, said (summarizing): “Humans are born with a potential. If you had evolved optimally, your potential would have unfolded fully and you’d become a homo sapiens. In most cases, you didn’t evolve optimally… Something happened that we call ‘upbringing’… and this is how you were normalized. Because we put a lot of value on normality.” (Watch video.)

Vera is right. But there’s even more to it: Human conditioning happens even before we’re even born. Some of it is already in our genes; we inherit both limiting and empowering conditioning from our ancestors. It’s a quite complex, so I’ll leave it at that for the purpose of this article… And as soon as we see the light of this world, programming is added. Not just during the first seven years of your life, which are crucial, but also during the rest of our lives.

How does conditioning happen? Through upbringing, education, culture, religion, media, friends, traumas and all kinds of experiences, which we label as good or bad.

So how then can we get rid of disempowering conditioning? Of those internal limitations that may have been holding us back from achieving the success we want?

If you feel like you may have been playing smaller than you really are or were meant to be, from achieving your goals and implementing your deepest desires, from leaving the legacy you’d like to leave, or raising your income, then I invite you to go through the following process with me to break free from your invisible shackles. Unchain yourself and ignite the burning desires inside of you!

Step 1:

Grab a pen and paper (ideally a large one) and start by drawing 3 columns. In the first column, you write all the goals and results you want to achieve but have found to be out of reach; anything you’d like to attain or do or have that seems too hard, too difficult, too “others can do this but not me,” too “I’m not good enough to get this,” etc. Think specific roles, promotions, income, opportunities, etc.; whatever it is for you.

Step 2:

Now for each item in column 1, in column 2 add the exact reason why you believe you cannot do or get it. E.g., what makes you think you cannot get the promotion or job you want (assuming you have relevant competence). These are the limiting beliefs that do not serve your desired success.

Step 3:

Once you’ve completed step 2 for each item in your list, in column 3 write down the root of your beliefs in column 2. Where did these beliefs come from? Was there a specific experience that shaped them? A trauma you suffered? Was it something you heard or saw as a child, something you observed around you? Could it be someone else’s belief that you picked up as yours? (We often take on other people’s limitations… our parent’s, our siblings’ etc.) Or did it come about more recently? Did you experience a setback that hurt your self-belief? Was your self-image affected by something that happened or that other people said about you? (I had an experience in the past that completely crushed my self-image and confidence and had to rebuild it from scratch!) Were you raised as a perfectionist? – Perfectionism stops many from believing they are ready… because as a perfectionist, you are never ready.

Take some time with this exercise, and once you’ve gained clarity, here’s how you can rid yourself from nagging self-doubt and take a leap ahead:

Step 4:

For each item in column 3, ask yourself: Does this belief really (still) make sense? Am I ready to let it go? Could I let it go? And if yes, could I let it go now?

Then close your eyes and with your inner eye, see it drifting away, floating up, up, up into the sky until it completely vanishes from your sight. Trust that it is transmuted. Once you did this with the first item, move on to the next one and so on until you reach the end of your list.

Notice how you feel now about what you wrote in column 1. Hopefully you’re feeling way better about them than before. This means, you are now ready to make a plan and take action… aligned action, inspired action, effective action.

Want help to get rid of your limiting crap fast? - Reach out to me!

As the CEO of TRANSFORM YOUR PERFORMANCE, Regina Huber drives bold, heart-centered leadership. She helps her clients accelerate their careers and become thriving leaders by leveling up their leadership of self & others.

Her eclectic experience on five continents started in Germany and includes leadership roles at BCG as well as ownership of businesses in Argentina, Brazil, and the U.S. This experience shaped her into a multicultural Transformational Leadership Coach, International Inspirational Speaker, and Author of Speak up, Stand out and Shine. She created five signature coaching frameworks and is the host of RISE TO LEAD Podcast. She also co-authored three other books and speaks five languages.

Over the years, she has spoken at events and taught workshops in the U.S., Africa, Latin America, Asia/Middle East, and Australia. For several years, she was an active Member of the Leadership Team of the Financial Women’s Association (FWA), where she co-chaired two committees, and she has collaborated with numerous organizations in Africa. She is a Member of Innovation Women. She was also the host of the What’s Your Spark TV show.

She has a passion for travel, adventure, and dance.

Regina Huber

As the CEO of TRANSFORM YOUR PERFORMANCE, Regina Huber drives bold, heart-centered leadership. She helps her clients accelerate their careers and become thriving leaders by leveling up their leadership of self & others. Her eclectic experience on five continents started in Germany and includes leadership roles at BCG as well as ownership of businesses in Argentina, Brazil, and the U.S. This experience shaped her into a multicultural Transformational Leadership Coach, International Inspirational Speaker, and Author of Speak up, Stand out and Shine. She created five signature coaching frameworks and is the host of RISE TO LEAD Podcast. She also co-authored three other books and speaks five languages. Over the years, she has spoken at events and taught workshops in the U.S., Africa, Latin America, Asia/Middle East, and Australia. For several years, she was an active Member of the Leadership Team of the Financial Women’s Association (FWA), where she co-chaired two committees, and she has collaborated with numerous organizations in Africa. She is a Member of Innovation Women. She was also the host of the What’s Your Spark TV show. She has a passion for travel, adventure, and dance.

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